Friday, February 10, 2017

10 years ago

     I haven't paid close attention to the date lately. I know it's February, but my mind has been in other places, so I didn't realize the actual date. I was looking through "on this day" on Facebook this afternoon and saw all my previous posts from years past honoring my daddy.
Today is February 10, 2017. Today marks 10 years since my daddy departed into eternity. 10 years.
     In some ways it seems like a lifetime ago, in some like it was just the other day.  So many things have transpired, so many life changes. So many times I want to share things with him or think how much he would have loved being there. I think how much he would love to watch JD play football and rugby, how I am positive he would be out here for every game, even if that meant buying a second house. I think about how proud he'd be of Cora and her accomplishments. 
    I think how much he would enjoy being a great-granddaddy. My oldest niece has 3 kids now, I can just imagine how spoiled they would be by their granddaddy.  He loved being a granddaddy more than just about anything in the world. I hope my nieces and nephews and my children know that, know just how much he loved them.
     I realize it's easy to put on rose-colored glasses as the years pass by. It's easier to remember the good than the, err, not so good. I know my daddy was far from perfect, but he was still amazing. As I think back now, he was one of my best friends. I didn't know it at the time, but looking back I know for sure.  We were pretty inseparable. 
     I don't have much to say that I haven't said in the last 9 posts, but I still wanted to do it. It's become a custom, a way to honor him and take time to remember. I remember more often than I can count, but this is a time I can be purposeful, not just suddenly be hit over the head with a stray memory, invading my head uninvited. I still dream about him every night. My mind places him in at least one dream every night, and every night I'm saddened to realize it was just a dream. 
     One thing that keeps me going, even after all this time, is knowing I will see him again one day.  Daddy wasn't loud in his faith, but he was strong in it.  I remember having a talk with him on the night he passed, asking if he was ready, if he was scared, if he was sure he knew where he was going... He assured me he was ready and he knew he would be with Jesus. I was there, holding his hand, when he met him face to face. I can tell you the exact moment. He had pretty much stopped breathing, his eyes weren't opening anymore, he wasn't really responding to us anymore, and suddenly his eyes shot open wide, he inhaled vigorously, and he was gone. I knew at that moment he had met Jesus. That's what gives me comfort, knowing that he is with his Savior and that someday I will be too. 
     But in the meantime, happy heavenly birthday, daddy! I'll be seeing you. 

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